The composition of menus has always been somewhat of an obsession of mine: indeed, I'm sure there are many who think I can write a menu far better than I can actually cook it. Getting the balance of descriptive prose right is a difficult thing: nobody wants verbose menus with flowery terms that make grand promises that are not delivered. Similarly, you should always write menus for customers and not for your own ego, so I tend not to use terminology that invites questions such as 'what actually IS that?’

The new style of listing single ingredients, also leaves me cold. Writing a ‘carte’ which is appealing, succinct and exciting is most definitely an art form. So I have more than a little sympathy for the catering team at Pembroke College in Cambridge, when I hear about complaints they received from their customers. It seems the esteemed students of the college - one of the oldest and richest in Cambridge - object to being served Jamaican stew and Chinese chicken on the basis that they're not authentic offerings and therefore misrepresent their culture. The students from the college that sells itself as "a college of poets and scientists, thinkers and players, who want to make a difference to the world" clearly have too much time on their hands, which is par for the course for almost every student I have ever encountered. Imagine working away in the kitchen, doing your level best to be creative and innovative, only to be castigated in this manner. The effort that has gone into producing the much-maligned dish of cauliflower, date and tofu tagine with Tunisian rice and coriander yogurt is not inconsequential, but it was panned because the rice 'wasn't really Tunisian’. I'd substitute it for the ubiquitous vegetable lasagna on the next menu.

Having said that, I have to agree that somehow food seems to sound more appealing when presented by other nationalities. Crouqe monsieur is far more appetizing than a cheese and ham toastie, choucroute has a ring to it that pickled cabbage will never have, see also tartiflette versus cheese and potato pie, crème brulee against burnt custard. You’d also choose pate de tete over pork cheese every day of the week.

Perhaps the gilded students would prefer their servants spent more time on the marketing of the menu than on their cooking of it? That would make a difference to the world. Though probably not for the better.